2007 Haiku Diary

You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll hurl...


Haiku 1/1

Woke up to dim sum.
Sleepy day, a sleepy day.
My friend Lew's in town.

Haiku 1/2

Hung with an old friend.
He doesn't like Less Than Jake
like back in high school.

Haiku 1/3

Finished some reading
went to Veggie Castle with some friends
then I did laundry.

Haiku 1/4

So hungry all day.
Full of cheap beer and new tats,
alone on the bridge,

Haiku 1/5

Got a second flat
on my way to the air pump
to fix my first flat.

Haiku 1/6

Cold lampin' all day.
Three meals of Mexican food
watching "Serpico."

Haiku 1/7

Got drunk closing up.
Biked home in the pouring rain.
Boy did I get wet!

Haiku 1/8

Job hunting morning,
then slacking all afternoon -
dude time with Joey.

Haiku 1/9

Food's always better
when it's stuffed into more food
and topped with some cheese.

Haiku 1/10

Dumb job interview.
I've been down on shit lately.
Need better focus.

Haiku 1/11

Shards of broken glass
in a gob of mayonnaise
wiping off my hand.

Haiku 1/12

Bean pies in Bed-Stuy
job leads and that collie weed
gray skies for these guys.

Haiku 1/13

Afternoon inside
listening to some records
before Manhattan.

Haiku 1/14

Shoot me in the face!
I had quite the hangover
and I worked 'til four.

Haiku 1/15

Martin wanted peace,
so I won't whoop my neighbor
for their loud music.

Haiku 1/16

Got an interview
for the perfect freelance gig.
Well, come on, cosmos!

Haiku 1/17

Sugar mouth all day
from fake-puking condensed milk
for a photo shoot.

Haiku 1/18

Giving up seitan.
A fun-crusher four-flusher
will do that to ya.

Haiku 1/19

It's flat tire Friday!
Everything's tiring me out,
nothing's going on.

Haiku 1/20

Fighting off a cold,
so I worked on some writing,
hearing the wind blow.

Haiku 1/21

It sure is winter.
I've been waiting to say that
for a good long while.

Haiku 1/22

Last night's burrito,
bacon egg and cheese, tuna,
broccoli fried rice.

Haiku 1/23

Pretty easy day
and a sorta restless night,
up and down the stairs.

Haiku 1/24

Utility days
are when you spend all your time
taking care of bull.

Haiku 1/25

Now it's pretty cold
and I made the same dinner
as the night before.

Haiku 1/26

Byers came to town
on the coldest New York day
since '03 or so.

Haiku 1/27

Went running with Jeff
and then walked around all day.
My feet hurt like hell.

Haiku 1/28

Fuck it whatever
Jesus Christ and motherfuck
Goddamn it to hell.

Haiku 1/29

Got some Razorcakes
with an article I wrote.
I'll send one to Mom!

Haiku 1/30

All week leads up to
tomorrow's job interview.
Can't think beyond it.

Haiku 1/31

Had an interview
for a job I'd really like,
and not just for rent.

Haiku 2/1

Been a bit depressed,
acting unmotivated,
not sure what to do.

Haiku 2/2

Went to a wine bar,
felt out of my element,
then quit complaining.

Haiku 2/3

Jonathan Richman
What an excellent showman
By all means, see him

Haiku 2/4

Barfing through my nose
old enough to know better
kinda embarrassed.

Haiku 2/5

Didn't get the job
that I'd been stressing about.
Whatever. Their loss.

Haiku 2/6

Fighting off a cold
in the February cold
while job leads turn cold.

Haiku 2/7

The fucking heat broke
Had dinner guests on the way
I made a huge meal.

Haiku 2/8

Walked around a bunch,
and had my first physical
in about four years.

Haiku 2/9

Jogging in the wind
losing feeling in my nose
wearing four layers.

Haiku 2/10

Neil and Jess are here!
We can walk around and eat
both at the same time.

Haiku 2/11

Chicken and waffles.
I wanna base my life on
chicken and waffles.

Haiku 2/12

Hung with a toddler.
"CSI: Miami’s on.
What's my life come to?

Haiku 2/13

Think I've got pinkeye.
Staring at some proofreading;
man, this temp job blows!

Haiku 2/14

Ophthalmologist
Trudging, dilated pupils
New York ice and snow.

Haiku 2/15

Worked for an hour,
took my first piss test ever.
Futility strikes!

Haiku 2/16

It was a T day!
Temping, Twin Peaks, Third Ave. Traipse
and Tofu Tacos.

Haiku 2/17

A fucking slushfest.
We're overrun with gray slop
and homemade pizza.

Haiku 2/18

Bartended real late,
dreading temping tomorrow,
but loving pancakes.

Haiku 2/19

Super tired day.
Running on three hours sleep,
oatmeal and bagels.

Haiku 2/20

Chillin' with a book,
getting paid to sit and read,
slackest temp gig yet.

Haiku 2/21

Made a rad chow mein
and didn't do that much else.
I guess that's OK.

Haiku 2/22

Been on a Kinks kick,
reminded of boomboxing
my porch in high school.

Haiku 2/23

Ten-hour workday,
ton of bagels and pizza,
saw The Lemonheads.

Haiku 2/24

Saw the "Reno" flick
with a crew of ten people,
laughing like crazy.

Haiku 2/25

Drank too much coffee,
a great winter antidote,
for cabin fever.

Haiku 2/26

Thought I'd get more done,
but just ate lots of chicken
and rode the subway.

Haiku 2/27

Kinda jumpy day.
Standing instead of sitting.
Is sugar to blame?

Haiku 2/28

Caitlin's moving van
had a dead battery and
wouldn't start back up.

Haiku 3/1

Getting out of bed,
spending the whole day waiting
to go back to bed

Haiku 3/2

This job recruiter
swears more than Richard Pryor
and works for Avon.

Haiku 3/3

Hard rockin' all day!
Band practice, guitar alone,
then a hardcore show.

Haiku 3/4

Ate tons of tofu.
Sharon's video art show
while I bartended.

Haiku 3/5

Hardly left the house,
did some cooking and cleaning,
went through my old clothes.

Haiku 3/6

Worked on some writing.
Actually kinda bored
Went out for Tex-Mex.

Haiku 3/7

Had an interview
and a double cheeseburger
to balance it out.

Haiku 3/8

Sell-out job proof test
taken on a desk marked with
graffiti ideals.

Haiku 3/9

Friday night at the
"Birthplace of Rollerdisco."
Poured one for Biggie.

Haiku 3/10

I saw a cyclist
run a light and hurt someone.
Good day until then.

Haiku 3/11

An excellent day.
Skateboard mission in the park
and breakfast nachos.

Haiku 3/12

Slept away the day,
hardly left the fucking house,
feel like a damn blob.

Haiku 3/13

Petite mal seizure
Six-hour hospital wait
Should've just stayed home.

Haiku 3/14

Slept 'til 4pm,
wondering what's up with me,
calling the doctor.

Haiku 3/15

Sleep schedule's still fucked.
Fancy benefit dinner
for my sister's job.

Haiku 3/16

DJ Wintry Mix
was up in the cut, so I
stayed at home, dancing.

Haiku 3/17

Errands in the slush
just like islands in the stream.
Did some Irish stuff.

Haiku 3/18

Slushtown, U.S.A.
Having some coffee and eggs,
and getting fresh air.

Haiku 3/19

Just ice cold lampin'.
Wonderin' what's happenin'.
Killin' time and feelin' fine.

Haiku 3/20

Bike ride to Harlem,
windy all the way uptown.
Soul food steamer tray.

Haiku 3/21

The first day of spring,
my first day at a new job.
Such fresh beginnings!

Haiku 3/22

Train to Bensonhurst
for a cancelled appointment.
Fuck Dr. Rocco!

Haiku 3/23

All day proofreading
copy about foundation,
lip gloss, eyeliner.

Haiku 3/24

Made seven pizzas
all day for my birthday jam.
Fed them to my friends.

Haiku 3/25

Did that crappy thing
where I woke up hungover
at dawn, by mistake.

Haiku 3/26

Lots of new music!
Took a walk to sort it out.
Headphones, Union Square.

Haiku 3/27

It's spring's first warm day
In and out of the house, just
sweating out Thai food.

Haiku 3/28

It's Epilepsy
if you have multiple seizures
that are unexplained.

Haiku 3/29

I'm twenty-eight now,
filling myself with fried fish,
starting a new job.

Haiku 3/30

Didn't do fuck all
but spend some tax return cash
and make mushroom soup.

Haiku 3/31

Sharon's outta town.
Total bro-fest at the crib,
just me and the cat.

Haiku 4/1

Life story tellers
had a boring convention
while I bartended.

Haiku 4/2

Atlanta zing wings
three week old baby nephew
delirious tired.

Haiku 4/3

We can blame hot wings
for what happened this morning
on the thundermug.

Haiku 4/4

Ate some barbecue,
hung with the little nephew,
lousy plane ride home.

Haiku 4/5

Back at New York speed,
blowing through the city and
landing freelance jobs.

Haiku 4/6

Two job interviews,
a little babysitting.
Tired out by night.

Haiku 4/7

Running around town
like I don't even live here,
acting cultural.

Haiku 4/8

Watched couples make out
while I stood behind the bar
counting down last call.

Haiku 4/9

Not quite rested up,
sitting nodding at my desk.
A cat in the sun.

Haiku 4/10

Went to two doctors
who were both running behind
so it was no prob.

Haiku 4/11

Dicking 'round online,
a slow day at the office.
American dream?

Haiku 4/12

Spring rain, just like douche
flushed the city through the day,
causing discomfort.

Haiku 4/13

Anniversary!
We've been together three years!
Don't get sick of me!

Haiku 4/14

Always stay up late
when you plan on resting up.
Theremin party.

Haiku 4/15

Bus ride in the rain.
Blues - Can you make the train talk?
Hey secondhand smoke.

Haiku 4/16

A discography
of my high school hardcore band
is now in the works.

Haiku 4/17

Got super tired,
got drunk for a second wind,
couldn't trick myself.

Haiku 4/18

Bus back to New York.
Nothing profound crossed my mind.
Had fun in Richmond.

Haiku 4/19

Cheeseburger party
at Joey's spot in Bed-Stuy.
Grease your blues away.

Haiku 4/20

Tired and grouchy.
Is it allergy season?
Am I getting sick?

Haiku 4/21

Aimless wandering
through the nicest day so far
wearing my tea shades.

Haiku 4/22

Catching up on sleep
from this week-long tear I had.
Enjoying freedom.

Haiku 4/23

Spent the day outside.
Start a new job tomorrow,
desking all summer.

Haiku 4/24

First day on the job
was busy in a good way.
Think I can handle.

Haiku 4/25

One job in the day,
another job in the night.
Ninety-nine cent Coors.

Haiku 4/26

Twelve hour work day.
Won't have time to spend the cash
that is coming in.

Haiku 4/27

Ate lots of tacos
because life is hardly life
without some tacos.

Haiku 4/28

Spent all day outside
except when I was sleeping
or watching "Twin Peaks."

Haiku 4/29

Where else but Target
can I find shower curtains?
Thanks monoculture.

Haiku 4/30

Have to act busy
even with no work to do.
Beware. Manager.

Haiku 5/1

Packed myself three meals.
Fueling my all-day work-day
with those Tupperwares.

Haiku 5/2

Quit my dumb ol' band
We were stagnant for too long
Hope they aren't too pissed.

Haiku 5/3

Just got two paychecks.
Reminded why I do these
twelve-hour work days.

Haiku 5/4

Art show at a church.
Thought I was open-minded-
Jesus is creepy.

Haiku 5/5

Ted Leo brings it!
Bartender fucked up my tab,
so I got some shots.

Haiku 5/6

Had a shitty brunch
then some delicious pizza
to balance it out.

Haiku 5/7

All loved Jonny Z.
Now we'll keep on loving him
while we miss him, too.

Haiku 5/8

Everyone knew him
and if they didn't like him,
they loved him instead.

Haiku 5/9

Funeral plans came.
Being sad is exhausting.
Couldn't get to sleep.

Haiku 5/10

Missed the barbecue
but there was beer left over
at my evening job.

Haiku 5/11

Tired and stressed out.
Went to a reggae concert,
and laid my blues down.

Haiku 5/12

It's good to see you,
but wish I didn't have to.
Funeral in town.

Haiku 5/13

Crossing Virginia.
Parents' houses, health food stores
and funeral homes.

Haiku 5/14

Jonny's funeral.
Take-out Mexican, drive home.
Jonny's funeral.

Haiku 5/15

In the New York swing.
Having some crunch time this week
going out of town.

Haiku 5/16

A slow day at work,
and packing in the evening.
Puerto Rico bound.

Haiku 5/17

Nap all afternoon
drink some Puerto Rican coffee
try to sleep that night.

Haiku 5/18

Walk through Old San Juan
and try not to imagine
pirates being there.

Haiku 5/19

I don't know why but
"Parents Just Don't Understand"
is stuck in my head.

Haiku 5/20

Read "Dune" on the beach
only wearing sunglasses.
Ate lots of hot wings.

Haiku 5/21

Vieques ferry
scratching at all my sunburn
watching the seagulls.

Haiku 5/22

Airport clusterfuck
and crazy San Juan traffic
made it hard to leave.

Haiku 5/23

I went back to work,
cooked some ravioli soup
and went out skating.

Haiku 5/24

Drunk across the street
locked out of his place, shouting
into his buzzer.

Haiku 5/25

A friend from Richmond
bartends at a whiskey bar.
That shit got ugly.

Haiku 5/26

Hit up Brighton Beach
water was so cold it hurt
bike on the subway.

Haiku 5/27

Cleaned my apartment
for the entire afternoon,
then watched three "Twin Peaks."

Haiku 5/28

Marinating food,
a rooftop and a backyard.
It's all for soldiers!

Haiku 5/29

So hooked on "Twin Peaks."
I stayed up late watching it.
Gonna be tired.

Haiku 5/30

The zombie movie
made me scared to ride my bike
through the park at night.

Haiku 5/31

Work's by the subway.
I don't breathe Manhattan air
on many workdays.

Haiku 6/1

Finally hot out.
Read The Onion site at work,
then ate lots of rice.

Haiku 6/2

Super duper hot
and my parents were up here.
Mom made ill brownies.

Haiku 6/3

Bottled my homebrew,
ate lots of cheap Chinese food,
listened to records.

Haiku 6/4

Got zines in the mail,
ate leftover Chinese food,
did some damn laundry.

Haiku 6/5

So-so day at work,
tired for no good reason.
Went for a bike ride.

Haiku 6/6

Another bad sleep.
Zoned out all day on the job
then got cheezeburgerz.

Haiku 6/7

The "Twin Peaks" pilot.
Can someone lend it to me?
I have to see it.

Haiku 6/8

Flew to Chicago,
then drove down to Milwaukee.
Neil's getting married!

Haiku 6/9

Brewery wedding.
Congratulations Neil and Jess-
You're married, I'm drunk.

Haiku 6/10

Booze taste in my mouth,
Hollandaise sauce on my eggs,
plane back to New York.

Haiku 6/11

Five of the last ten
weekends were spent out of town.
What a crazy spring.

Haiku 6/12

The cats woke me up
so I was groggy all day,
cursing them felines.

Haiku 6/13

Work flew right on by,
the train home came right away,
I cooked paella.

Haiku 6/14

Scared my homebrew's flat.
Went to Prospect Park and saw
The Neville Brothers.

Haiku 6/15

Rode my bike around.
All is cool when you're going
to a Blowfly show.

Haiku 6/16

Central thunderstorm
at the Television show,
margarita full.

Haiku 6/17

Rock rock Rockaway
that's where I spent my whole day.
So lean back, lean back.

Haiku 6/18

Made a vegan meal
ate it with my vegan friends
went to vegan sleep.

Haiku 6/19

Worn out and tired,
on autopilot all day
while work was stressful.

Haiku 6/20

Went home after work,
had some Terrytime and
an ice cream soda.

Haiku 6/21

Sharon's video
got projected at a bar.
Lots of people came.

Haiku 6/22

Kinda hungover
headachy all day at work.
My friend Mike's in town.

Haiku 6/23

Crappy and sleepy.
It's Mike and Ryan's birthdays,
and I cooked alllll day.

Haiku 6/24

Pizza for breakfast,
biking home and then jogging.
Bro triathlon.

Haiku 6/25

Work as usual,
ate leftovers, did laundry.
Pretty boring day.

Haiku 6/26

Middle of the road
Italian ristorante,
I'm dusting the crops.

Haiku 6/27

Running in the park
felt like I was swimming laps.
Thanks, humidity.

Haiku 6/28

Humid city swims
boozehound's howl, barflies buzzing
food delivers late.

Haiku 6/29

I can't win at work.
Stay ahead and I miss stuff,
thorough and I'm late.

Haiku 6/30

Make crockpot chili
ate lots of crockpot chili.
Leftover chili.

Haiku 7/1

A skateboard mission
all the way across Bed-Stuy.
"Son! Do a ollie!"

Haiku 7/2

Hiding in the tub.
Hissing at me, on the john.
I’m the catsitter.

Haiku 7/3

Got an eye exam.
The proofreader needs glasses!
The writer can't read!

Haiku 7/4

Meat cooked with fire.
Happy Birthday U.S.A.
We're still evolving.

Haiku 7/5

Oh Lord, what's that smell?
Left some weed in my wallet
from last night's get-down.

Haiku 7/6

Rockaway house show.
Lost in Queens for two hours
seeing LL's hood.

Haiku 7/7

Steve Ritt was in town.
See hippies, New York's not bad.
Just go to the park!

Haiku 7/8

Ninety-plus degrees
spent the day at Brighton Beach
didn't do much else.

Haiku 7/9

Slow at work today.
Didn't slack constructively.
Answered some emails.

Haiku 7/10

The humidity
on the streets is swimmable,
the sky is orange.

Haiku 7/11

It's performance art
if you pour stuff on your head
and I hate the crowd.

Haiku 7/12

Helped move a futon
right after I went running.
Got it all sweaty.

Haiku 7/13

Drove down to Philly
after work, eating cheese fries,
saw Jorge and Janelle.

Haiku 7/14

Hit the Jersey Shore,
saw Richmond friends in Philly
and stayed up too late.

Haiku 7/15

Philadelphia,
the city where it's still cool
to be a wigga.

Haiku 7/16

Walked the bridge with Jeff
then ate a fly curry that
made me forget work.

Haiku 7/17

Got a summer cold
sneezed away the sunny day
and coughed 'til nighttime.

Haiku 7/18

Stayed home sick from work,
but Sharon got a new job!
Hooray for Sharon!

Haiku 7/19

Annoying work day,
stuffed my damn face at Zaytoon's,
humid-ass bike ride.

Haiku 7/20

Worked for ten hours!
But then saw Odetta play.
She made it better.

Haiku 7/21

Two birthday parties
biking around like a fool
sunburning my face.

Haiku 7/22

Hit Fire Island.
Now my face is on fire...
...FROM A BAD SUNBURN!

Haiku 7/23

Ravioli soup
pissing rain through the morning
cleaning the backroom.

Haiku 7/24

Went to visit the
kids I used to babysit.
Stressed for no reason.

Haiku 7/25

Doctor's appointment,
'cos I'm changing health insurance.
Some saw comedy.

Haiku 7/26

Asshole mechanics
kept me up half of last night
with paint fumes and noise.

Haiku 7/27

Heading for Richmond
reading that Harry Potter
flying friendly skies.

Haiku 7/28

Jonny Z tattoo.
He's been gone for near three months,
it's there forever.

Haiku 7/29

The flight home's cancelled.
It's pissing rain, I'm sweaty.
Looks like I'm stuck here.

Haiku 7/30

Up at 4 a.m.
Flight to N.Y., train to work.
Super long commute.

Haiku 7/31

Sleepy at my desk.
Went and did laundry later.
Are you bored also?

Haiku 8/1

Sat up late reading
and casting Chinese food spells.
Harry Potter rules!

Haiku 8/2

Last day on the job
Sharon cut her leg open
cleaning out her desk.

Haiku 8/3

Stayed in after work.
Sharon made dinner and I
wrote a short story.

Haiku 8/4

Hot as balls out there!
Everyone stopped making sense
by 9:30 or so.

Haiku 8/5

Opened my third eye.
Summer of Love exhibit
then Simpsons movie.

Haiku 8/6

Stuck at work 'til 7
Did a whole bunch of cooking
Worked on a story

Haiku 8/7

A punk rock sauna
A house show in hot weather
Airborne, topless drunks

Haiku 8/8

The train tracks flooded
hottest day of the summer
walked to Manhattan.

Haiku 8/9

Whole lot of nothing.
Burrito acid reflux.
Pack for New England.

Haiku 8/10

Grilled frozen pizza,
mussels, lobster, fish, salad,
corn on the cob.

Haiku 8/11

Drunk friends from grade school
motorboat to a sandbar
meteor shower.

Haiku 8/12

Looking at the bay.
I'll be at my desk at work
in twenty hours?!

Haiku 8/13

Ate lots of cupcakes
Chilled at home for the evening,
drawing a comic.

Haiku 8/14

No revelations..
Just some reading and cooking.
Amy stayed with us.

Haiku 8/15

My sister's birthday!
Drank some Guinness, gave her a
Simpsons DVD.

Haiku 8/16

Saxophone douchebag
practices upstairs at night.
Dolphy? Try DON'Tphy!

Haiku 8/17

Drunk right after work.
Got stuffed on Mexican food.
Slowed up the whole night.

Haiku 8/18

Reached a fitness goal;
looping the park twice, jogging.
Took phatty bonghits.

Haiku 8/19

Overcast beach trip
Rain on the bus ride back home.
Slow going Sunday.

Haiku 8/20

Awesome or boring:
Going to bed all early,
staying in weeknights.

Haiku 8/21

Work was slow again,
plus, another day of rain.
Drank beer with Kareem.

Haiku 8/22

Art film opening.
Ocean of skinny, stubbly
tall guys in blazers.

Haiku 8/23

Laundry after work,
baked potatoes for dinner.
Whooptie fucking do.

Haiku 8/24

Running after work
then biking off to a bar.
Dense humidity.

Haiku 8/25

Mosquito bite path
gold sun passing overhead
sandy shoe dune walk

Haiku 8/26

Biked to Brighton Beach.
Wet ass on a bike seat chafes
while I ride back home.

Haiku 8/27

Worked on some drawing
to add some worth to my day;
balance out Target.

Haiku 8/28

Went to the movies
and the movie was sold out
so we had some drinks.

Haiku 8/29

Drew a few pictures
and then fell the hell asleep,
having scary dreams.

Haiku 8/30

It's Joey's birthday!
Variety of liquors
sloshing in my gut.

Haiku 8/31

No complaints today,
but nothing awesome either.
So it goes, sometimes.

Haiku 9/1

September beach trip.
Going as much as I can
before it's too cold.

Haiku 9/2

Cut off all my hair.
No more getting dapped up by
Rastas on the bus.

Haiku 9/3

Went to the parade,
stuffed my face with jerk chicken
and smoked too much pot.

Haiku 9/4

Hit Junior's for an
orange freeze ice cream soda.
Goodnight, sugar high.

Haiku 9/5

I cleaned the kitchen!
'twas poetry in motion!
Mop pentameter!

Haiku 9/6

Worked on a new song.
Rode my bike to Williamsburg
and hung out up there.

Haiku 9/7

Drove down to D.C.
Got to Tom and Hope's real late.
Work was weak, also.

Haiku 9/8

Drunk uncle get-down
at Sharon's cousin's wedding.
Hey, Macarena!

Haiku 9/9

Bank info stolen.
Rear-ended leaving D.C.
Skipped lunch, got nauseous.

Haiku 9/10

Went to a punk show.
Faces across a dark room;
old friends, older friends.

Haiku 9/11

Cooked a ton of soup
and took it easy at home,
working on a zine.

Haiku 9/12

Faux hawk: New mullet?
We'll crack jokes and bag on them
in just a few years.

Haiku 9/13

Hasids call my bluff
and run with me in the park
blowing horns, blessing.

Haiku 9/14

Carne asada
99 bottles of beer
4 a.m. bathroom.

Haiku 9/15

Cab horn woke me up
clear skies at Coney Island
out of it all day.

Haiku 9/16

Hung with my parents
walking around Manhattan
at tourist cruise speed.

Haiku 9/17

Mom made us a quilt
crazy Day of the Dead art
and pillows to match.

Haiku 9/18

Went for a fast jog.
Balanced the exercise with
a badass burger.

Haiku 9/19

Early work meeting
mosquitoes all through the night
free beer opening.

Haiku 9/20

6 a.m. jogging.
Napping under my desk by
about 3 p.m.

Haiku 9/21

Left from work early
drank too much cheap liquor at
a comedy show.

Haiku 9/22

Yes! Sinus problems!
Too rainy for the beach! Rad!
Stayed up late! Awesome!

Haiku 9/23

Guy at the drugstore
is shouting about how he
needs Valtrex, TONIGHT!

Haiku 9/24

My meds aren't covered
by my new insurance. Had
another seizure.

Haiku 9/25

Saw some comedy
after my new writing class.
It's Sharon's birthday!

Haiku 9/26

Insurance problems
catch 22's, debacles.
Move to Canada.

Haiku 9/27

Work's been pretty sweet
'cos the boss is out of town.
The stress level drops!

Haiku 9/28

Work was slack again.
Didn't do jack shit after.
Still beat from Monday.

Haiku 9/29

Sharon's birthday jam!
Air hockey, ping-pong and pool.
Liquor, beer and weed.

Haiku 9/30

Super fun houseguests
walking off the hangover
drinking papaya.

Haiku 10/1

I baked some cookies
and then I ate the cookies.
I'm full of cookies.

Haiku 10/2

Mind-mushingly slow
all of Wikipedia
desk, apathy, fucked.

Haiku 10/3

Working on writing
when I should be proofreading.
American dream!

Haiku 10/4

Worked on more writing.
It made my brain move too fast
and I couldn't sleep.

Haiku 10/5

Went to see The Blow.
She owned it alone on stage
under purple lights.

Haiku 10/6

Soul food feast, buddy.
Adam from Boston's in town,
watching "Mr. Show."

Haiku 10/7

Cop on a Segue,
my MP3 player broke...
...but the Red Sox won!

Haiku 10/8

Stupid lunch meeting.
Give me some benefits if
the corp's doing well.

Haiku 10/9

Twenty degree drop
became fall during the day
manic temperature.

Haiku 10/10

Jiggity jogging
almost barfed in my damn mouth
it's wicked humid.

Haiku 10/11

For the last two weeks,
quiet before the torrent.
Makeup catalogs.

Haiku 10/12

GRE study.
My memory failed me, I'm
even worse at math.

Haiku 10/13

Took the GRE.
Went to a sweaters-only
backyard barbecue.

Haiku 10/14

Went to Queens. Got lost.
That seems to happen every time.
Rad Chinese food, though.

Haiku 10/15

Stayed in, just writing.
The Shaolin and the Wu-Tang
could be dangerous.

Haiku 10/16

Feeling better now.
Making up for lost sleeping
bit by mosquitoes.

Haiku 10/17

Cuban food for lunch,
Mexican food for dinner.
Lots of pork. Sorry.

Haiku 10/18

Shitfoot incident.
Kicked out of the litter box.
Guess who stepped in it?

Haiku 10/19

Frustration, whiskey,
dry burger with wet weather,
secondhand trifling.

Haiku 10/20

Went to Hoboken.
It was more like "Broboken,"
but, hey, something new...

Haiku 10/21

Goddamn teenagers
on the stoop across the street
kept me up 'til 4.

Haiku 10/22

Life is best with a
big-ass map of Africa
in the living room.

Haiku 10/23

After work had a
patty melt but no gator belt
before writing class.

Haiku 10/24

Cooked up Hoppin' John.
It had rained all day and it
wasn't eighty out.

Haiku 10/25

Leftovers, gnomesane?
F.I.T.A. busy day,
with full moon fever.

Haiku 10/26

Drove to the Catskills,
dark road in the pissing rain.
Can't see the mountains.

Haiku 10/27

Grown up hippie town
still raining, kinda dreaming
real ghosts in my sleep.

Haiku 10/28

Red Sox sweep World Series.
Not so mad at Bill Buckner
after all of this.

Haiku 10/29

Show at a canal
watching it from a drawbridge
old friends across water.

Haiku 10/30

Workshopped my writing
and got a bunch of ideas
to edit that shit.

Haiku 10/31

Running before dark
to avoid getting egged by
some DAMN TEENAGERS.

Haiku 11/1

These DAMN TEENAGERS
tried to jump Sharon and I
but we scared them off!

Haiku 11/2

Day of the Dead, the
night ended at a gay bar
right near the projects.

Haiku 11/3

Sharon's parents came.
Ate tostadas, fish and chips,
and of course, pizza.

Haiku 11/4

Dying to go to
Brooklyn College for grad school.
But will they take me?

Haiku 11/5

The cat doesn't know
that it's daylight savings time
so he wakes us up.

Haiku 11/6

Got all sugared up
at a grad school open house.
Somehow lost my voice.

Haiku 11/7

Drawing at my desk.
Not letting my mind stagnate
while it's slow at work.

Haiku 11/8

Average good day:
Mexican food for dinner
and slow on the job.

Haiku 11/9

Sharon bought me gifts
which I had to carry home.
Jesus did that too.

Haiku 11/10

Lazy Saturday
never exerted my mind
went to bed early.

Haiku 11/11

Homemade granola
powered me over the bridge
on a skateboard jam.

Haiku 11/12

Totally over
this dark-before-I-leave-work
newfangled bullshit.

Haiku 11/13

Busy day at work,
Korean food, writing class.
The day flew right by.

Haiku 11/14

Raw food for dinner.
At an art show watching the
douchebag last supper.

Haiku 11/15

Back to some writing
trying to edit old stuff
totally confused.

Haiku 11/16

In my head all day
singing falsetto at work.
Justin Timberlake.

Haiku 11/17

Cooked so much soul food.
Drank energy drinks for a
dance party 'til 3.

Haiku 11/18

Pancake celebrate!
Woke up with no hangover;
magic is at work.

Haiku 11/19

The park is empty
if you run after work now,
more space than New York.

Haiku 11/20

Blew out the afro,
looking like Art Garfunkel
mixed with The RZA.

Haiku 11/21

Worked on a comic
then got some story ideas
and made pumpkin soup.

Haiku 11/22

A vegan potluck
and then a Philipino
pig roast in Bed-Stuy.

Haiku 11/23

Wrote through the day then
saw Crispin Glover's slide show
and his new movie.

Haiku 11/24

Ate too much pizza
went to a Brooklyn beard bar
ran into China.

Haiku 11/25

Edited stories
all day with an afro pick
crockpot blackeye peas.

Haiku 11/26

Ate a lot of beans
finished reading "Wind Up Bird"
and watched "CSI."

Haiku 11/27

Dude with warm-up pants,
girl says she lies about age.
Watching their blind date.

Haiku 11/28

Basic grown man stuff
Shit like jogging and laundry
took up my whole night.

Haiku 11/29

Hot sauce in my beer
and tilapia tacos
burning through the night.

Haiku 11/30

Joked around at work.
Kinda weird to admit it,
but I like my job.

Haiku 12/1

Yuletide jammings with
egg nog like marshmallow fluff
and a one-hitter.

Haiku 12/2

Worked on some drawing.
If you're not down with chilling
then we can't hang out.

Haiku 12/3

Could hardly get up.
Just dead on my feet all day
dead in my brain, too.

Haiku 12/4

My last writing class.
They all liked my new story,
then we went for drinks.

Haiku 12/5

Pissed and understaffed
doing yoga on the phone
baking potatoes.

Haiku 12/6

Running on black ice
and crunching through snowy grass
just in a hoodie.

Haiku 12/7

Tired as fuck, yo.
Cooked up some fish, stayed in
watching "Boogie Nights."

Haiku 12/8

Handled some B.I.
like the barber shop and a
whole lot of nothing.

Haiku 12/9

Neighborhood walking,
not sure if I "get" Daft Punk.
Fish fry with soul sides.

Haiku 12/10

Crowded A.M. train
back to back, an old lady
farted on my leg.

Haiku 12/11

Three hour meeting!
Sitting for longer than a
"Lord of the Rings" flick!

Haiku 12/12

Restless at my desk
full of holiday cookies.
Nothing exciting.

Haiku 12/13

The snow didn't stick
neither did the hale or rain.
Dark in the morning.

Haiku 12/14

The party got hype
when I spilled guacamole
on my Adidas.

Haiku 12/15

All day on my feet
walking across the canal
sleeting heading home.

Haiku 12/16

Oh noes! Sharon's sick!
Did some crap around the house
had pizza for lunch.

Haiku 12/17

Tofu, broccoli
the laundromat, the baby
the mama, the cell...

Haiku 12/18

Free rum and hot wings
at this holiday party
where Sharon teaches.

Haiku 12/19

Work Christmas party.
Corona in the daytime,
catching a headcold.

Haiku 12/20

Made homemade pizza
for Christmas dinner and then
we exchanged presents.

Haiku 12/21

Tired and sneezing
stuck at work later than planned
packing for VA.

Haiku 12/22

AmTrak with a cold
Penn Station wait - train delay
my sister's engaged.

Haiku 12/23

Burt Reynolds nightmare
woke me up at 6 a.m.
Shut the fuck up, Mom.

Haiku 12/24

Recorded three songs
with my old friend Jonathan
and ate eighteen wings.

Haiku 12/25

Jesus enchiladas
birthday bourbon and Bud Lite
HOLY HANGOVER.

Haiku 12/26

Got back on the train
cooked a healthy meal for once
went to bed early.

Haiku 12/27

First day back at work.
The good times were a-rollin'!
It's a wild ride, y'all.

Haiku 12/28

Ever notice how
the people with the least soul
wear Triple Five Soul?

Haiku 12/29

IMax planet crash
scaring a nearby toddler.
"Cosmic Collisions."

Haiku 12/30

Breakfast nachos, dude.
Vegetarian toppings
burping that garlic.

Haiku 12/31

The year ended well
with ping-pong, tacos and some
scotch that smelled like fire.